Being invited to serve as best man at a close friend or family member’s wedding is a tremendous honour. There’s no doubt that you’re a very important person in the lives of the bride and groom-to-be, as evidenced by the fact that they’ve asked you to play the role of best man for their wedding.
There is more to the best man’s role than that of a simple groomsman. He (or she, if the groom picks the best woman) is responsible for several things; most importantly, he is the groom’s closest confidant, personal valet, and logistical guru for the events leading up to and on the day of the wedding. This is your official, all-inclusive guide to the normal roles and obligations of the best man.
What Is A Best Man?
In the lead-up to the wedding and on the big day itself, the best man or best person serves as the groom’s right hand. They are traditionally in charge of the groom’s entourage and the bachelor party.
A male attendant who is chosen by the groom to stand alongside him during the wedding ceremony is known as the best man. The groom’s closest friend or brother is typically chosen to be his best man at the wedding. He may be responsible for assisting in the planning of the wedding, appearing alongside the groom during the ceremony, and delivering a toast during the reception. The bride and groom may choose to have more than one best man, in which case they’ll be referred to as groomsmen or co-best men.
What Is The Role Of The Best Man
For most couples, the best man is the groom’s fairly close friend or relative, but this decision can vary. The best man is typically a brother or good friend, but there is no hard and fast rule about who must play this role.
On the groom’s side of the wedding party, the best man takes on the equivalent of the maid of honour’s responsibilities. Thus, the best man should be someone the groom and bride can count on implicitly all through the process of arranging their wedding.
The role of the best man can vary depending on the couple’s preferences, but generally, the best man is responsible for several key duties leading up to and during the wedding. These may include:
1. Help Choose the Suits
As one of his primary responsibilities, the best man must shop for the groomsmen’s suits. The best man should help the groom organize a suit fitting for the ushers and other participants of the wedding party.
The best man must consult the couple on the wedding’s overall aesthetic and make the call on whether the groomsmen’s attire will be purchased or rented. The groom and bride typically cover the cost of their wedding attire, but if guests are expected to chip in for formalwear, everyone should be on the same page about it.
2. Offer Encouragement During The Band Selection Process
Even if your best friend hasn’t asked you to be the best man just yet, he may still want your advice on choosing an engagement ring. While the groom is out shopping for an engagement ring, offer your honest opinion on the matter, but do so as calmly as possible. Your role is to act as a calming influence during what can be a tense situation when shopping for an engagement ring.
3. Plan The Bachelor Party
The stag party needs to be planned out in great detail months before the wedding. Even though it may seem excessive to begin preparations so far in advance, trust us when we say that the sooner you get started, the less stressful this task will be and the better the stag do will be. Since everyone is so busy, you need to get a date in the calendar as soon as possible to ensure that no one else can claim that time slot.
The next step is to formulate some broad objectives. The United Kingdom or some other country? Seven days or just one? What kind of vacation would you like, a cheap weekend away or a once-in-a-lifetime trip with the guys?
4. Meet the Ushers at the Reception Desk
The best man must know who will be serving as ushers and who will be in the other groomsmen’s parties. There are certain roles and responsibilities of the usher that you may or may not be familiar with; however, everyone involved must understand what is expected of them.
Even though that has a very serious tone to it, you have the opportunity to make this a very enjoyable experience. Before the wedding planning (and, more importantly, the stag do planning) begins, invite the couple (and, if possible, the rest of the wedding party), order some food and drinks, and use the time to bond with their closest friends and family.
5. Making A Speech At The Reception
The best man is traditionally expected to deliver a speech during the reception of the wedding. In most cases, the speech is delivered after the maid of honour has already delivered her remarks and before the speeches given by the bride and groom. An opportunity to offer congratulations and well wishes to the newlyweds, as well as to share a few humorous or sentimental anecdotes about the couple or the groom, is presented in the form of a speech that is given by the best man.
The speech given by the best man is typically broken up into three sections:
An opening, during which the best man can meet and greet the guests and express gratitude to them for attending the wedding.
The body of the speech, in which the best man reflects on the friendship that exists between the groom and the best man, as well as telling a few jokes and stories about the groom.
The conclusion, during which the best man raises a glass to the bride and groom and wishes them a life filled with joy and contentment together.
Before the big day, the best man should give the speech a few times in front of a mirror to perfect its flow and ensure that it is clear to everyone in attendance. In addition, it is essential to keep the speech reasonably brief and get right to the point and steer clear of saying anything that could be insulting to the couple or embarrassing for any of the other guests in attendance.
6. Dancing With The Bridesmaids During The Reception
During the reception, it is customarily expected of the best man to dance with the bridesmaids. It is expected of the best man to do this as a way of demonstrating his support for the couple and contributing to the creation of an enjoyable and joyous atmosphere at the reception.
At some point during the reception, the maid of honour and possibly some of the other bridesmaids will ask the best man to dance with them. This may involve the best man dancing with each bridesmaid one-on-one, or it may involve the best man dancing with all of the bridesmaids at the same time during a group dance.
The best man is expected to show his respect and gratitude to the bride and groom’s female attendants by dancing with the bridesmaids during the reception. These attendants have been a part of the wedding preparations as well as the ceremony itself.
It is important to note that this is not a requirement in modern society; therefore, some best men may choose not to dance. In addition, just like the majority of other aspects of weddings, this can change according to the traditions, cultures, or individual preferences of the couple getting married.
7. Helping The Groom To Transport Gifts And Other Items To And From The Wedding
To assist the groom in transporting gifts and other items to and from the wedding, one of the tasks that fall under the purview of the best man is to act in this capacity. This can include things like wedding rings, the license to get married, and any other items that need to be transported to either the ceremony or the reception.
Before the wedding, the best man can assist the groom in packing up any items that need to be taken to the location of the ceremony, ensuring that these items are transported in a secure and risk-free manner. This can include things like decorations, flowers, and even favours for guests to take home after the ceremony. Additionally, the best man can assist the groom in ensuring that the wedding attire and accessories are transported to the location where the wedding will take place.
After the ceremony, the best man can assist the groom in collecting any gifts that were given to them during the reception, as well as any other items that need to be brought back or transported back to the groom’s home. This may include items that were rented, decorations, and any food or beverages that were left over after the event. It is also the responsibility of the best man to assist the groom in ensuring that any thank-you notes are drafted and delivered to the guests promptly.
To ensure that everything goes according to plan on the day of the wedding, the best man and the groom need to coordinate their efforts and come up with a game plan regarding how they will handle any items that require transportation.
It is essential to take note of the fact that these are typical responsibilities for the best man; however, the duties are, in the end, decided by the couple who is getting married. There is a possibility that certain couples will not require all of the responsibilities that have been outlined here, and additional responsibilities might be added to accommodate particular preferences.
In conclusion, the role of a best man is to support and assist the groom throughout the wedding planning process and on the day of the wedding. The best man is typically a close friend or family member of the groom and is chosen to stand by the groom’s side during the ceremony.
The best man’s duties may vary depending on the couple’s preferences, but typically include helping with wedding planning and organization, holding the wedding rings during the ceremony, making a speech at the reception, and acting as a witness for the couple if necessary.
Other traditional duties include dancing with the bridesmaids and helping the groom transport gifts and other items to and from the wedding. The Best man plays an important role to ensure that the wedding day runs smoothly and is enjoyable for the couple and the guests.
To know more, read how to pick a best man.